As the music plays, i couldn't help but remember. it's sick, but i set it on a constant playback to soak myself in the pain. i dont even know if the regret is worth it, because i dont know if it will ever work, even if i were to turn back time. it's true then, that you were the one i gave my heart to. and i couldnt take it back. a new start couldnt make me forget, or simply maybe this period of time is not enough to erase my memories. i realise, i can still cry for you, or is it just because i want to convince myself, how much i can give to you? sometimes, i feel like im creating this little drama of my own, after watching too many shows, hoping to live in my fairytale. i dont know what i want, moping after what i've lost, knowing that even if i havent lost it, i couldnt have it anyway. you left so much of yourself in my life, i find myself unable to wipe you out entirely. yet, you were able to forget me, and face me in a new perspective. you probably went through the same amount of pain, maybe even more. you did right, but part of me hate you for being able to do so. the selfish me still want the best of both worlds. the love that you gave me, is probably more than anyone is capable of giving. and i let it slip by. all because of my foolishness and lack of courage.