Hmm. Gonna talk about this person whom i was once pretty close to, this person whom i lost as a friend. I don't know how things turn out this way. I really have no idea. I didn't want it this way either. Everytime i see you, i feel a stab of guilt. Everytime i see your msn pop up, i wonder if i should take the initiative to talk to you, maybe to ease things a little. But ohwell, this part of me always tells me that too many a time i've been taking the initiative, it's time you do something about it. If you don't, so be it. And so, in this way it goes. Huihong says, it's a pity things turn out this way. But somehow, I felt a form of relieve and freedom, a kind of jie tuo i guess. Well, i'll leave things in your hands, but i doubt you'll do anything about it.


I think I'm trying too hard to find someone in my this little world. I know i have all the love i need in all my other little worlds. Sometimes, there's this voice telling me, I'm being too greedy and i should be happy with what i have already. But sometimes, it is precisely this lack of love in this particular little world that makes it so blank and empty there, in stark contrast to my other little worlds. The difference is so obvious, this world is so close to me, i simply can't ignore the difference. No matter how much i try to patch it up with things i get from the outside, it never seem to be able to make up for the difference. And i look at my friends, they all seem to be able to get their love from that world of theirs, why am i the only lost one?